His Ministry

Another weekend serving at the church and I feel exhausted, both mentally and physically.  After church I took a walk around Granville Island with a few friends.  It was a sunny afternoon, and I really enjoyed just browsing around, checking out the different stores and neat little souvenirs and other what-have-you's in them. 

In talking to a trusted friend who has also been somewhat of mentor to me, he reminded me to remember to take my Sabbath.  He also reminded me that in my tiredness and in the midst of all the problems we seem to have in ministry, that Jesus said His Grace is sufficient for us.  As well, he asked me to think back to the time when the Lord first touched my heart, and what was it that made me want to serve Him.

Later on I went downstairs to get some water, and just sat in front of the piano in the dark.  I played a few simple and familiar tunes, and sang.  I liked how it felt like I was just singing for God, that I wasn't singing for an audience of people, but for the Lord alone.  He gave me my musical abilities, and I was giving them back to him.  I know that in our Christian faith we are not to base our convictions on feelings, but tonight I felt that love for God that I hadn't in a while (because I suppose I have been too pre-occupied in making His ministry perfect.. with my own insufficient abilities).  It was simply nice to be there with God, be Still, and know that He is God.  For a moment I let my guard down, and my heart was tender for a while. 

I suppose the one very good thing about knowing the difficulties of ministry is that it pushes me to pray more.  And when I feel like I simply cannot do it, I am reminded that it is God doing his work through us (think I mentioned this a few days ago) but not us trying to make His ministry into a success in our eyes.  In the end, it is all very simple, we do God's work because he first loved us, and we are to spread His love to those around us.  Forget about numbers, forget about playing the right chords (this one's to make myself feel better, hehe), forget about looking 'good', and just learn to love as we've been loved.  It's just that simple...